It just started happening…..my hidden farts. Now, I am not one to hold them in. I am usually discreet and I apologize if someone ever walks in the room when I fart but I am never shy about it. That being said, I also know when the farts are coming and I am ready to deal with them. So I was shocked when a my hidden farts started happening.
I was in the shower earlier in the week. I put my feet on the side of the tub to soap up my leg. When I bent over to start washing an all too familiar sound trumpeted the earlier morning ritual. I had farted and it quickly stunk up the shower. It was so bad I had to stick my head out of the curtain for air. As I continued to wash up my mind was overcome by the stink and the shock that I had a hidden fart. What had happened and why wasn’t I ready for it.
A day later I was lying on the sofa watching TV and waiting for the nightly delivery of food. I thought I had heard someone coming up my stairs and I twisted to look at the door. As I turned, I ripped one. I was shocked and happy that no one was in the room with me. I had farted again, no warning, no pressure in my belly I just ripped it.
They were never wet but they were loud and forceful. What is happening?
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6 comments:
I ripped it in Target.
Maybe you eat to much cheese.
on the treadmill at the gym. I have no clue if there was any sound because I had my iPod blasting away.
I ripped one just now.
Maybe you drink too much soda.
it's the reason why i keep scented lotion in my office. i chuckle to myself when people walk in and say 'oooo it smells so good in here'.
dude, it's a sign of old age, the inability to control the sphincter muscles of the anus. be happy it doesn't happen to you when your in the middle of blending some hot chicks eyeshadow and you abruptly crack one out. thank god they don't horn out or have some crazy smell (yet) but shit imagine the embaressment held back. first thought did she feel that sudden eruption through the tip of the brush that your hand is holding. frick, no look'n back now, it already happend just keep blending like nothing happend:)
hmmm well I guess it depends on how old you are. I am dreading my twilight years when I will no longer be capable of holding them in and feeling the all too familiar bubble in the bowel feeling!
Sadly I will probably lock myself in my home and fart with reckless abandon rather than risk the prospect of public farting!
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