They mill about farmers markets and Starbucks running into people and not caring. They clog vital passageways to discuss their latest Crocs, their PBS tote bags, and to complain that the coffee/bread/fruits/veggies are better in Europe. They are everywhere and their numbers are growing. Instead of being the flesh eating variety, yuppie zombies try and steal your dignity and self worth by looking down at you for not wearing organic clothes, biking, and not knowing what to do with Broccoli rabe.
To avoid them do not go to whole foods, whatever cupcake bakery is in your neighborhood, generally anyplace near water with a Anthropolgie/J.Crew/outside cafe area.
If you travel in these areas you must be armed to fight. This how to combat this: If one of these zombies run into you look into their eyes and see excuse me you bumped into me. if they are engaged on their cellphone or bluetooth earpiece its ok to pop them one.
Its an evil that is growing.
2 comments:
ahem, it's broccoli rAbe. Now if you'll excuse I am having my earth-colored Crocs resoled - I absolutely must have them to wear to Michel Richard's this week. It's de rigeur.
Europe food is better.
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